The Frustration

Often, when one goes on a new exercise program or diet, one expects to lose weight fast. But even though I did in the past lose a lot of weight, I never got to a happy place. My weight loss efforts have yielded slow results. Even after Chittu I lost 25 kg over more than 3 years. This time I have lost about 10 kgs, since my highest post partum weight with the Princess. But I feel I have been on the weight loss mission ever since the day I delivered the Princess. As a result of my weight loss efforts I often get injured -my knees and hips bearing the brunt of the pain. Also I did fracture my little toe once and left me off exercise for about 4 weeks. But that apart, I feel like I have watched my food and eaten healthy for a long time now. As a family we don't eat junk food like chips and fries and aerated drinks and limit our intake of processed carbs. We do lead a healthy lifestyle. And while this has not exactly translated into stellar weight loss over the last 2 years, I think that choosing to be healthy is an achievement in itself.

Be that as it may, still seeing the same number on the scale frustrates me. I get frantic, often ill tempered and irritable. There are days I cry. I go through old pictures to see if I look any better or wear old clothes to see if they fit better, often with no luck. Then I think I should crash diet or go back to the gym. While going back to the gym is a necessity, crash dieting is not an option. I need to soon figure out how I can spare one and a half hours in the morning at the gym, without affecting my other deliverable such as packing Chittu's lunch or getting him a wholesome breakfast. A cook will not work for me. But yes I need to figure it out.

In the meanwhile, I will still be tracking my food and try to get a bit more strict with Kayla's BBG program. Its a 12 week program and I am on week 7 already, with visible improvement in strength but no change in my body stats. I love her workout and her way of eating is also totally doable. So despite my not so impressive results so far, I am going to get back at this weight loss business seriously. Re-dedicate yourself to it and get it done. I really wish I could be one of those who lose 30 kg in a year and stuff. My body has never co-operated that way till date. But a girl can always wish right?

I will write again. Till then, any suggestions to speed up my weight loss?

Anyone there?

I have been dilly dallying from writing this post. I know I need to get this off my chest, but have been grappling with many things. Being a mom to 2 is not just 1*2. Its infinitely more difficult and even though I have a lot of help and even fairly well mannered children, sometimes it becomes way more than what I can deal with. Add to this the misery of being stuck at the same weight even though I think I'm giving weight loss my everything. And then the comparison. 2 years after Chittu was born I brought my weight into the sub 80s. Now after the princess, even though I did not go upto where I was when I started the whole weight loss thing, I still have not been able to reach the 70s.I feel ashamed and frustrated. Most times I feel that having the Princess was the worst logistical decision I've ever made. I feel like everything is going downhill.

Anyway this blog has seen my journey once and I'm fairly determined to get rid of this weight. So I came back to where I started - this blog of mine. My old posts inspire me. So I'm going to get back journalling my weight loss efforts here. Follow along (if anyone is reading this, that is) and together we'll see if is really possible to lose weight by cutting calories and working out.

Right now this is how I exercise:

• I follow Kayla Istines BBG workout and am on week 5.These are 3 strength training workouts per week, and I work out at home.
• I run once a week (usually Sundays) and my last Sunday run distance was 8.5 k. I am progressively increasing the distance.
• On the other 3 days of the week, I do walk at home videos by either Leslie Sansone or Jessica Smith that last about 40-45 minutes. 
• I exercise every day for atleast 30 minutes.

This is how I eat:

I try to eat as much veggies and vegetarian protein as possible and watch my intake of refined carbs and sugar. I have started journalling my food beginning yesterday. However I do eat rice, though in limited quantities.

Also this time around very time I try to eliminate rice, I end up with severe gas and bloating issues that leave me writhing in a unbearable stomach pain. When I over exercise or push some limits, I get severe pain around my c-sec incision. When I stop stretching after exercise, I get a crippling pain in my hip joint, that leaves me unable to sleep on my sides. All in all I'm on a tightrope and the balance is too delicate.


My weight is roughly 83 kg and I may have lost about 10 kg from my highest post partum weight after the Princess. But my efforts have intensified since February and have not yielded results in the manner that I expected. As I said in the beginning of this post I am feeling very frustrated. Sometimes I want to scream, sometimes I want to just breakdown and weep but those things are not going to help me get to goal.

I will keep this space updated, and for any readers who are left I am also journalling this on Instagram one picture at a time. I'm #nivkrish21 just in case.Any  old readers? Let me know how far along you've got?