Monday, April 16, 2012

Speaking my mind

After losing 20+ kgs and being about 12 kgs from goal weight, every morsel I put in my mouth (or dont) shows up on the weighing scale. One trip out of town, one change in standard situation, one constant becoming variable, causes me to stir away from my kitchen and make bad eating choices. The mid night monster is back, and after a day of eating good, a handful of sweets from the jar does not show any mercy.

My full time maid a.k.a "maami" is off for 10+ days and I'm left with a situation that is terrifying to think of. What complications!!!! I can't even begin to type this out. Sigh!

Back to weighty issues, I left station for a day from Friday night to Saturday night, and am right back to where I began last week. Self pity does not contribute to weight loss! So I am fighting the munchies, after giving in on the weekend. And, oh boy, shall we not talk about how hard it is to start all over? My hugest enemy is sugary food, and sometimes it makes me feel so horrid, to think about how much it takes control over me, even after how far I have come.

I fear, whether I will stay overweight all my life? Will I ever hit goal weight? Will I ever win the battle over sugar? I am a wee bit sad, and pitiful of where I am right now. I intended to hit 67 kgs by August this year. But slowly that dream is fading out.

PS: Whirlwind weekend posts will resume with improvement in weight loss.


  1. My feelings and questions are exactly as yours (except the 20 kg loss!). I won't deny it that it sometimes makes me feel very low.
    Hope you will find answers and win this battle against excess weight :-)

    1. yes at the beginning it is hard, but you get strength with encouraging results. But with time, as the weight plateaus it gets even harder to keep up the spirit. The stress of not losing weight even after hard work at the gym and predominant healthy & controlled eating is rather discouraging for me!

  2. hey don't be so hard on urself! come on you have already lost 20kgs and to me that's so inspiring. Don't let one day get in the way, just forget about it and get on with your usual routine. We all slip up sometimes. I generally let myself have a treat/give into my cravings once a week, this controls my binge eating. One meal out of 21 meals is hardly anything.
    Also since you have been strength training, maybe you are putting on muscle weight, hence no weight loss is reflected. Check with your gym instructor, she might be able to tell u better.
    Hang in there and keep ur chin up

    1. :) i hope all those wonderful things you said are/come true :)

  3. I think not focusing so much on a scale number helps. Are you working out? Take your measurements and check those every month because your body shape can change even if the scale isn't. Also, take notice of what you can do now that you couldn't before. Weight loss is never linear and it really isn't just about the scale. Too often we focus too much energy on the box!

  4. :) yes I have my measurements taken. I will soon find out if there is an "inch" progress :)
    yes i do work out with a personal trainer 2/3 a week and do cardio exercise at the gym 2/3 a week
    yes, only this morning i was able to 5-6 pull ups on the pull up machine ( is there a better word?) on my own wihout the trainer supporting me from below :)
    SO yes, may be I have made some progress?
    love you, you made my day!!!!

  5. Weight loss is a slow process have faith.


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