Friday, September 7, 2012

The holiday weight gain and other reflections

Yesterday, still being in the high of my "holiday" I went to meet my Dance teacher. Our dance school is celebrating the annual day shortly, and is gearing up for a performing a dance ballet. I was not a part of the stage performance, because I was holidaying in the US while the rest of the group was sweating it out.

The choreography was in progress when I entered, and I waited in the back till it was over. Much later I realised I propbably had a sloppy posture. Then after the class was over, I think I must have dawdled like a duck from the back of the class to meet my dance teacher. Her first reaction was to point at my tires of fat  and rather candidly inquire as to what it was all about? "Too much cheese" she asked? "Also ice cream" I added.

But I cringed on the bike ride back home and even almost ran into an autorickshaw! I was muttering to myself under the helmet and terribly embarrassed about what  had just happened. Being a dancer, one is expected to take care of shape, but seriously, I did not expect my 2-3 kg weight gain to show up so badly. Obviously my posture and gait just brought my body image come tumbling down in my guru's eyes!

I'm kind of thankful I'm not going to be on stage shortly. But I know I must get rid of the excess weight very very soon!

Does 2-3 kg look so awful on me? I was 100 kilos two years ago! Anyway, that also brings me to my totally messed up ways of eating.

I eat food and cheese and sweets and sugar and pizzas and pastries and all such other yummy food, merely because it tastes so good. I feel so tempted. I can't say no. I cannot control portion size. Ieat food because I love to eat. Not because I have a bad life going or because of stress at work or home. I . love.food. Period. And I cannot contain myself from eating cheesecakes when I am at the Cheesecake Factory. Obviously I am overweight. And obviously its really hard to say no. Ask me?
 

2 comments:

  1. You ate it on your holidays that to your first time there don't be too harsh on yourself - your back home now you can lose the 2-3kg in no time :)

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    Replies
    1. haha.. i know thats exactly what I'm thinking, but I guess i would have eaten like that even if this was my nth trip. I would have just found a different reason!

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