Last night, after eating my dinner, I was on the verge of tears. This weight loss thing has been getting to me. I have been holding around 79.5 for a LONG time now, atleast two months, since I got back from the US. I did touch the 78s early on in October. But I have come back to the 79s again. Yes I admit I went through a phase of mid-night mysore pak eating. But that lasted a week or so and I have been working out pretty hard. I dont even expect to lose a pound a week. But I was hoping that I'be back to my pre-US weight (around 77) in atleast two months.
I fished out my old tracking diary and saw that I am around the same weight I was in June. Four months later, I am in the same stage (ofcourse I gained 4 and lost 2) and I feel so so bad about myself. I had a personal trainer in June, stuck to around 1500 calories per day and did see the scale move down. I might be doing a similar thing this month too, and even though I vowed to do go back to Phase 1 SBD, I figured that at 1 meal in a day is not exactly SBD compliant. My main fear is that I would not want to faint or pass out during the 12.5 k on Sunday. The other reason is that I continue to eat healthy though I take about half a cup of white rice at my meal or a couple of idlis or broken wheat and such stuff. I don't think that is bad per se. And sparkpeople shows me a lower car consumption than before. I guess I will just have to be consistent and see if there is any progress.
The Scientist alsosuggested that I get my thyroid checked to ensure that there is no other obstacle that is making it hard for me. I will do that soon too. Meanwhile, I want to just close my eyes and be 12 kgs lighter when I open them.
I know I have to swallow the pill of patience and just keep at what I am doing. Ofcourse, I continue to marvel at my body's ability to run even at this weight. I'm terribly sorry about the ranty post. I just had to tell you guys two things. Firstly that my SBD attempt is only partial and Second that I am so so surprised by how difficult it has actually become to get rid of this weight!